I always have a plan. Always.
Whether it be the time I am to wake up, shower, go to sleep, I mean EVERYTHING is planned.. and usually hour by hour…
I can never be found without ‘my planner.’ & if you do find me without it, you will find one worried, anxiety filled girl. aka: a girl who is not trusting God in all aspects of my day (some days not even in any) Am I really unable to trust Him that He is still holding me in the palm of his mighty hand?… I need to release my need for control. I need to let God control me completely, in every sense of the word. I need to realize He is near no matter what. I need to see that He cares even for the small details.
In my first semester away from home and in college, I have never doubted my salvation or Christ’s love for me-which I am so thankful for! But I also haven’t made my Lord Almighty my 1st priority.
I have allowed other things to be so time consuming that the One who gave his life for a filthy sinner such as me has been pushed aside. I am so thankful that my heart would not stand for this and I prayed day in and day out for “You, Oh Lord, to stir me. Break me, melt me, mold me, fill me.”
This weekend, I was stirred.
Sunday morning, we headed to Grace Evan (like any other Sunday for the last 18 years). But this was not like any other. Jimmy Young brought the Word of God (as always). And when I say brought it, I mean it. No holding back. I HAD to listen. His focus was on Ephesians 5: 1-14…
To add to my stirring… tonight, my mom and I had sweet, sweet girl time. We went out for Mexican food before heading to Central Church to hear one of our favorite authors and fellow “Jesus girl”…
Lysa Terkeurst. Lysa spoke right to me tonight in saying “Inconvenience Me.” In so many ways, I am about convenience, which goes hand in hand with my impatience and and greed. These affect all areas of my life.I must be inconvenienced. I must be stirred. He must be first.
He is working. In this weekend. In this day. In my relationships. In my heart. And I couldn’t be more thankful.
God, INCONVENIENCE ME. Mess up my plan. Make me make the hard decisions. Wake me from my sleep.I want to shine for You.
I will strive to be 1) Joyful, 2) Prayerful, and 3) Thankful in the coming days and beyond.
Oh how God is good. He hears my cry. And HE ANSWERS. I don’t know about you, but that overwhelms me with excitement.
I do not have to obey. I can head for the fiery depths of hell. But I am able to serve the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.. for all eternity. How beautiful.